Assorted Goods

Welcome to Assorted Goods, a place for everything that doesn’t quite fit anywhere else. Here, I’ll share a mix of thoughts, experiences, and stories—from the everyday to the unexpected. It’s a collection of whatever’s on my mind, and I’m excited to see where it takes us.

An Open Heart in Divided Times
Madeline Madeline

An Open Heart in Divided Times

I still have hope—maybe because it’s all I can hold onto. I hope that we’re capable of deeper compassion, a little more understanding, and a lot more honesty. That we’re able to see that these issues go beyond politics and get to the heart of what it means to be seen and valued. And maybe, if we’re honest, we can start acknowledging that this isn’t just about policy differences. It’s about where we draw the line on who deserves to live freely and fully in a country that was supposed to guarantee that to us all.

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29 Pokémon Evolutions and Counting
Madeline Madeline

29 Pokémon Evolutions and Counting

A very merry unbirthday to me! Well, except that it’s my actual 29th birthday (November 2), approaching at max speed, and I’m gearing up to look back on this past year with a blend of curiosity and a magnifying glass. Birthdays are the ideal checkpoint to take inventory and ask myself the big questions: What’s working? What isn’t? Am I becoming the person little Madeline once dreamed of?

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Actually, Don’t Pick Me.
Madeline Madeline

Actually, Don’t Pick Me.

The phenomenon of “pick-me” energy is a hot topic, with many people voicing their grievances about women who seek this validation. Ironically, while the intent is often to enlighten, these discussions can sometimes feel contradictory and generally miss the bigger picture. “Pick-me” energy is a nuanced issue deserving compassionate examination. It’s not just about calling out behaviors; it’s about understanding why we fall into these patterns and offering ourselves—and others—a little more grace.

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Me, Myself, and We
Madeline Madeline

Me, Myself, and We

Let me tell you about the time I got lost in the merge. I went full throttle into premier league soccer...and NFTs. Yep, you read that right. I’m quite literally screaming internally writing this right now. I had no business being into “Web 3” (don’t even ask me what it is now) and waking up at 6 AM to watch the Tottenham Hotspurs. But I did it because I thought that’s what couples do—share the same hobbies. In a turn of events that shocked literally no one, that relationship didn’t last. And honestly, that phase of my life was a perfect data point and reminder that not everything has to be a couple’s hobby.

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Love, Luggage, and Learning to Reroute
Madeline Madeline

Love, Luggage, and Learning to Reroute

The hardest lesson I’ve had to learn is that healing is not linear. Being in a relationship while dealing with trauma means I’m constantly negotiating with two different realities—the one in front of me, and the one that my trauma is distorting. Learning to separate the two is like trying to solve a puzzle with pieces that keep changing shape. It’s exhausting, but it’s necessary work.

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Grow Through What You Go Through
Madeline Madeline

Grow Through What You Go Through

For me, learning resilience was a bumpy ride. Growing up, I didn't have a lot of stability. My childhood was a patchwork of chaotic events, and I often felt like I was just trying to survive. My nervous system was permanently in fight-or-flight mode until I was about 24 years old. But survival teaches you things. It taught me how to adapt, how to find moments of joy in the darkest times, and how to hold on to the belief that things can get better. I’m 28 now, and in just four years, I can tell you with certainty that things can get better.

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Don’t H8 Me (Or Do)
Madeline Madeline

Don’t H8 Me (Or Do)

Instead of seeing their dislike as a personal failure, I now understand that it’s merely a reflection of their own preferences and biases. As long as I feel good about who I am and maintain my integrity, their opinion holds no power over me.

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Peaches & Perception
Madeline Madeline

Peaches & Perception

Laugh loud or don't, be your juicy peach self or try a different fruit altogether. Just know that, regardless of your fruit preference, you are sexy, beautiful, and gorgeous. And there is someone out there who undoubtedly agrees.

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Pheromones? Nah, that’s that me, espresso.
Madeline Madeline

Pheromones? Nah, that’s that me, espresso.

Despite all the scientific explanations, there's still a certain magic to attraction that can't be fully explained by chemicals and evolutionary theory. Sometimes, we’re drawn to people who defy our usual "type," and the reasons can be mysterious. Me, personally, I like confidence, introspection, and a lil bit nerdy. Yes baby, tell me more about your Lego collection. Perhaps it's their unique personality, a shared sense of humor, or an unexplainable connection that makes somethin’ flutter, but your weird crush is valid and honestly, not your conscious fault.

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Nine Hour Breakup Roadtrip
Madeline Madeline

Nine Hour Breakup Roadtrip

As the horizon welcomed us at the end of our drive, I realized that sometimes the hardest journeys are the most necessary. They force us to look in the mirror, to see not just the reflections of who we were with someone, but who we are capable of becoming because of them.

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Bi The Way…
Madeline Madeline

Bi The Way…

It's crucial to remember the diversity within the bisexual community. For some, there's a stronger attraction to one gender over another, but this doesn't make anyone less bisexual. Others might find their attractions are more balanced or fluctuate over time. For me, it genuinely depends on the day. Sometimes I’m a Lil Yachty girlie, others it’s Faye Webster all the way. (Yachty is adorable and I don’t want to hear what you have to say.)

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Anti-Sole Mate
Madeline Madeline

Anti-Sole Mate

I hope our collective culture will someday embrace this philosophy of love and life. Until then, I’m thrilled to share that the peanut butter to my jelly is NOT the same person who Yankees my Doodle—and that’s just the way I like it.

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When You Know, You Know. Allegedly.
Madeline Madeline

When You Know, You Know. Allegedly.

“WHeN yOu KnOw YoU kNoW” insert SpongeBob meme here. ‘Tis the battle cry of the “knowers.” I have always been camped firmly in the “I have no idea” zone, and the mantra has always made me feel trapped in a pressure cooker of expectation. It serves as a constant reminder of my perceived inadequacy in navigating matters of the heart.

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Pajama Power Hour
Madeline Madeline

Pajama Power Hour

Disclaimer: I am certainly not claiming to be some sort of guru on the path to healing, but I've definitely racked up enough life experience to feel confident in sharing the tools that helped me break free from the clutches of my past.

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A Naked Little Pistachio
Madeline Madeline

A Naked Little Pistachio

The armor I meticulously crafted to shield myself from pain and vulnerability may have inadvertently become a barrier to intimacy and authentic relationships.

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Fairy Closure Mommy
Madeline Madeline

Fairy Closure Mommy

No longer shall we be ensnared by the siren song of external validation, for we have discovered the sweet melody of self-assurance. Reflect, learn, and then let that sh*t go. Free yourself from seeking validation from others and embrace the freedom of owning your truth.

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All Bangs, No Rizz
Madeline Madeline

All Bangs, No Rizz

There are a billion jillion hot people in the world. As much as I truly hope that you feel like the most beautifulsexygorgeous person on the planet, it’s essential to recognize that attractiveness goes beyond physical appearance. So you look cool in the buff — what else you got, my guy?

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Flirty Grocery Store Eye Contact
Madeline Madeline

Flirty Grocery Store Eye Contact

It's too easy to get caught up in the rush of our lives, dismissing these small moments as insignificant blips. But if you pause for a moment, allowing yourself to linger (Queue The Cranberries) in the spaces between the hustle and bustle, you'll discover the profound significance they hold.

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It’s Not You, It’s Not Me, It’s Us.
Madeline Madeline

It’s Not You, It’s Not Me, It’s Us.

The time you’re attempting to confine a sea monster in a tiny box, remember – sometimes, it's alright to release your grip. (I predict you were pissing off the Kraken anyway.) It's okay to cherish the love you once shared while acknowledging that it's time to move forward. By doing so, you're not only opening doors to new opportunities for yourself but also for your partner. ‘Tis what love is all about.

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Everybody Is My Bestie
Madeline Madeline

Everybody Is My Bestie

Like a good sandwich (man, I love a sammie), a solid conversation is comprised of several key ingredients – you’ve got active listening (the bread), conversational reciprocity (the protein), respect (the cheese), and empathy (your veggie of choice, might I suggest, Maddy Lettuce?).

But hold the mayo, because today I'm serving up the secret sauce– the mindset shift that makes me a particularly engaging conversationalist.

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